Separation Anxiety

Do you ever feel anxious about leaving home for college, starting a new job or moving to a new city or country? Does the anxiety affect your normal sleep pattern and emotions? Is such feeling keeping you from enjoying routine activities? If so, you need to know more about separation anxiety disorder.

Separation anxiety is a psychological condition in which a person has excessive anxiety regarding separation from home or from people to whom he or she is emotionally attached. Studies have found that adult separation anxiety is more common than childhood separation anxiety. Separation anxiety symptoms include:

• Recurring distress when separated from the subject of attachment such as hometown, families and friends
• Ongoing worry about losing the subject of attachment
• Persistent, excessive worry that some event will lead to separation from a major attachment
• Excessive fear about being alone without the subject of attachment
• Inability to fall asleep without being near a major attachment figure
• Recurrent nightmares about separation
• Ongoing physical symptoms such as dizziness, headaches, nausea, or palpitations when there is separation or anticipated separation
• These symptoms last more than 4 weeks

It seems socially acceptable for children to experience separation anxiety. Leaving home and separating from parents are big transitions for children, and they often get empathy and support from others. Adults may lose their cool if they display symptoms of separation anxiety as a result of changing jobs or moving. Many of us overlook the fact that separation anxiety is a symptom of a co-morbid condition. Research indicates that those suffering from separation anxiety have higher risks for developing ADHD, bipolar disorder, panic disorder, and other mental illnesses.

We tend to cling to familiar faces and routines, and run from uncertainties and risks. But leaving the old and starting the new often lead to exciting opportunities. If we embrace such adventurous experience, separation anxiety is just a short-term psychological reflex for the new transition. There is nothing quirky about acknowledging the anxiety. Actually, recognizing the condition alerts us to let go of our attachment to the past, and continue to strive for the best.

Early intervention for separation anxiety helps achieve successful recovery. Behavioral therapy includes exercises to help face the anxiety. Cognitive therapy first helps one identify thoughts that may trigger anxious feelings, then develops coping strategies. Psychodynamic therapy encourages separation anxiety sufferers to talk about underlying fears and worries. Besides seeking help through professional therapies, people can try meditation to calm their hyperactive inner energy. The most effective way to cope with separation anxiety is to establish a strong bond with the new environment. The moment we attain gratification in our new job, and build trust in our new relationship, we come to realize that we find an island of peace and stability in the raging surf. Then, anxiety disappears by itself.

As life challenges go, anxiety caused by separation is rather minuscule. There is no need to feel solemn when we leave the present comfort to venture into the future radiance. ☺


(This blog is dedicated to my dear friend Ceci. Bon Voyage!)